<HTML><FONT FACE=arial,helvetica><FONT SIZE=2>Ana,
<BR>
<BR>Until I read your question of me not being able to wait until I returned, I
<BR>had not really considered the implications of that statement. Of course I
<BR>ONLY meant that interms of being able to join in the more experienced threads
<BR>of conversation. I'm considering the return just as I am the beginning.
<BR>Whatever happens, happens. I'm trying really hard to NOT have any great
<BR>expectations. I've been keeping a journal designated strictly for the range
<BR>of feelings I have as my departure looms nearer. I jsut cannot beign to
<BR>explain how many dreams this trip is fulfilling. It's hard to keep those
<BR>dreams from taking over, as they have had many years to brew.
<BR>
<BR>Returns are funny things, however. You step from one liminal state right
<BR>into an entirely different one. I wonder how long one can live like that?
<BR>
<BR>I would like to ask those of you who have walked more than once...were you
<BR>ever let down when the "initiatory" experience wasn't there? Or were you
<BR>able to concentrate on altogether different aspects of the journey. I am
<BR>thinking the Camino is like a building block, whereby each trip builds
<BR>another room or another hallway. And I can't help but associate the journey
<BR>to Teresa of Avila's Interior Castle.
<BR>
<BR>I guess if I am honest, that "down-time" frightens me a little. Once I get
<BR>back to the states, I have little to no time to get back down to earth, find
<BR>another job, only to leave again in another two months. I also fear those
<BR>times when I have a moment to remember my life on the path. I fear that
<BR>longing. But you're right. One has to deal with it, I suppose.
<BR>
<BR>If I remember correctly, you're in Japan, yes? When will you be returning to
<BR>the place you are meant to be?
<BR>
<BR>Much love,
<BR>Gabrielle</FONT></HTML>